


Is This The Real Life?

by pennedbycat



Category: Biohazard | Resident Evil (Gameverse)
Genre: Game: Resident Evil 3 Remake (2020), Gen, Honestly just enjoy this crack fic, Nemesis is broken
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:34:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23676199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pennedbycat/pseuds/pennedbycat
Summary: Jill witnesses Nemesis glitch for a moment, making her ponder her entire existence. If she didn't know any better, she'd think someone was playing a video game about her life. But are they? Crack fic.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	Is This The Real Life?

**Author's Note:**

> I was minding my own business last night... playing on Inferno for the first time and I was running away from Nemesis. I heard him running, but he never caught up to me. So, I went to check it out, and I just saw him running into the door. It was all fun and games 'til I mocked him. Then his ass respawned, leaving me screaming like a little girl. Enjoy Jill's reaction.

A mansion full of zombies, giant spiders, hunters, dogs, and humanoid creatures? No problem! Every citizen you had sworn to protect, turning into flesh-eating creatures? Giant bugs that spit a whole nest of babies down your throat? Fantastic! This night just couldn't get any better. 

Oh, _wait_. But it did. Because now she was helping _Umbrella_ of all things, trying to rescue what civilians were left that hadn't either turned, or perished entirely. Jill had begrudgingly agreed, all because of the people. She was still an officer; she considered it her duty to help any way she can, even if that meant siding with enemy. 

The former S.T.A.R.S. member was heading back from the subway control office, having just gotten the train back on track (finally, that only took _how_ many steps? Geez.) Unfortunately, Jill ran into trouble on her way back towards the station. That goddamn tyrant was in her way _again._ He needed a new hobby. Might she suggest something nice like... knitting? 

Coming through the main avenue again, she ran as fast as her feet could possibly lead her. Dodging zombies were one thing, but when the big guy caught up with her... that was when she found herself in a world of trouble. She made a run past the supermarket, practically stumbling backwards as she was startled by the zombie in the police cruiser. But he was on her heels now, she could hear his stomping footsteps get closer and closer. Jill yanked the metal door leading to the alleyway open, continuing in a sprint. By the time she reached the end of the alleyway, the brunette had to stop and listen. Wasn't he _just_ behind her? Normally, she wouldn't be this stupid. But it was like something else was controlling her in that moment, leading her back to the metal door. Much to her surprise, the tyrant was running in place, not even bothering to open the door. She knew he _could_. So what the hell was going on? This thing would plow through walls to get to her, and now he was just... broken?

Jill tilted her head, watching the Nemesis as it continued to try and go through the door. After a moment or so, she just laughed. So, Umbrella had created this killing machine that sometimes didn't know how to open a goddamn door? Oh, this was priceless. She might even tell this one to Carlos. 

"What's wrong, asshole? A door too much to handle?" The brunette rolled her eyes, turning around to start heading back to the station. But what she didn't see was that Nemesis finally stopped and disappeared from the area. Her mind started to wander, so much that she nearly jumped out of her skin the moment the tyrant popped out in front of her again. 

It made its usual outcry, and Jill immediately reached for her gun. "Jesus Christ, don't you EVER give up?!" She dodged the tyrant's swinging fists and gave it a solid uppercut before she took off running. 

_"Jill! Where are you? Do you need backup?"_ Carlos chimed in from the radio.

The brunette made a dash past another zombie, shooting it twice in the head before grabbing her radio. "No, I just reached the station. That son of a bitch followed me from the power station. He doesn't know how to give up--" she spoke into the radio, hooking it back on her belt as she pulled the shutter tight. Nemesis was hot on her trail again, beating against it. It was only a matter of time before it gave way and he was after her again. 

"I'm heading your way now! We don't have much time--" Jill was out of breath, but she still moved as fast as she possibly could. By the time she met up with Carlos and company, the brunette hadn't heard any footsteps behind her. They were safe... for now. It was a good thing that he wasn't as intelligent as he could be-- otherwise they'd all be dead by now. Kudos to Umbrella for releasing a faulty tyrant to come after her. Maybe she'd send them a postcard when all of this was over. 

"There you are! Nice to see you're in one piece--" Carlos started, only to be caught off by Jill. 

"Yeah, yeah. So, are we all squared away?"

The mercenary frowned, moving his weight from one leg to the other. "Not quite. We still need another thirty to forty minutes to finish maintenance."

_Great._

Jill just sighed. She felt like this was just some giant joke. Like _someone_ was enjoying themselves, and no, she didn't mean Umbrella. But-- c'mon, it's not like this is some fucking video game, right?

Because that would be _ridiculous._


End file.
